a journey

Thank you for coming here. No really, thank you for listening. It means a lot when i put some words out there and you take the time to come and read the stuff that i'm plunking out onto my keyboard. It feels i'm priming the pump. Words deep down are floating up. Words that need to be said. Thoughts that need to be articulated and feelings that need sorting. This blog has always been a safe place for me to do that. The last year has really been something for me. i've made mistakes. i've had moments of self doubt. But i've worked to right the wrongs and i am stronger now than i was 365 days ago. That is encouraging. Most of my journey has been a private one and some of it will stay private. However, this week i have become aware that a portion of my growth will come in the sharing of the difficult parts of this path.
And so, i choose growth.

Yesterday, as i gazed up from a blanket in my backyard, this tree had my full attention. It's January here in Mesa, and last week we had a cold snap with day time temperatures in the 30's and 40's. This week it is in the upper 70's and even the 80's. It's funny how quickly the temperature can change in life, too. Just 6 months ago i was at a real low point. Today i am happier than i have ever been. Ever. And i know the words are about to spill from me just how i came to be in this spot. I do feel a tad bit disoriented, but really hopeful at the same time. A bit like this tree. i don't think it knows if it's Fall, Winter or Spring! It dropped a ton of leaves today. It decided to finally shed the unnecessary weight. i'm nearly ready to do the same~